Forget the spirit of Harry Hotspur. We need the magic of Harry Houdini....

Stoke 2 Spurs 1

You ok for more statistics? Of course you are.

Spurs (back in the 1913 season) played 13 games and lost 10, drawing 3 before finally winning a game against Newcastle on November 23rd. We managed a 17th place finish that season with the manager Peter McWilliam keeping his job until 1926 and through the Great War - winning one FA Cup and finishing 2nd in 1922. Our current run of 6 losses and two draws is the second worst start in our history. Post WW1 in 1928, 1935 and 1977 we were relegated, all times with better starts.

Arguably, you could take a positive out of all this. The fact that we have to go all the way back to the year the Titanic sank tells us that performance wise, we haven't done too shabby for the best part of a century of seasons. But this year, we have truly excelled. Everything that is wrong with the club and team has finally broken through the superficial mask that was hiding the wretched truth.

The DoF system. Levy's greed. Over-rated players and expectations. Arrogance from the chairman to assume we were close to breaking the Top 4. Comolli and his obsession for signing the wrong players. No leadership. Apart from the blip of wins in pre-season, our form has been beyond dismal. It's been Derbyesque since the Carling Cup final. But let's avoid going over old ground, because all the fuck-ups and mistakes have been highlighted a million times already.

Lost in translation

How do we get out of this mess? Considering we are in a position where we have to start thinking about reaching 40 points to possibly give us a chance of surviving (how surreal is that hey?) the fact is, retaining Ramos might see us slip even further behind (based on how little things change from game to game). Once the gap is 10 points or so, then if you think the players are struggling now, watch them give less than 1% when the light at the end of the tunnel is faint. They're all be too busy thinking about what team to jump ship too. Modric, Bale, Hutton, Woodgate etc....bye bye.

So the only thing left to do is to either have Ramos walk or sacked and hope someone is crazy enough to take the helm. That one clichéd footballing knee-jerk is needed now more than ever, as dirty as it makes me feel saying it. The board will probably wait. Not for the UEFA Cup game, but next Sunday's home match against Bolton. If Levy has already decided to wait, then this game will either be the one that saves Ramos job for another week or the one that condemns him.

The positive out of this never-ending negativity is that if Ramos goes, so will Comolli. Levy is accountable for the mess but is untouchable until we get to the point of no return. He'll sell up and fuck off. But at what price (in both sense of the word)?

I wonder what the mood will be like on the team coach as it drives them back to London? Can you imagine Ramos and Poyet and the players all having it out, laying their footballing souls bare? Or do you reckon they're all be chilling, listening to their ipods and chatting on their mobiles? No leadership. Not a single whiff of it. Obvious to me, you and everyone else but not so obvious to the millionaires with their feet up on their way back to their plush cribs.

'Bottom with just 2 points? I'll get you out of there in a jiffy'

Spurs fans are already talking about discounted season tickets (yeah right) and who would stay and go 'when' we go down. Some drama queens are even beginning to wonder if we will make it out of there at the first attempt. Dizzy heights, how I miss 12th place.

I might join in with the dramatics if we don't get three points against Bolton and then I can truly look forward to QPR and Palace (replacing Arsenal and Chelsea).....that's if they don't both come up, giving us a wave and a wink as we pass them by, downwards into the hellish Championship.

I'll end on the whole 'luck' thing. We don't have much of it. Apart from the Bent goal which should have been ruled offside. And the penalty that hit the woodwork a few times (although it was not of any true consequence). But when you lose Corluka to an injury that sees him taken to hospital and replaced by Dawson who then gets sent off..........you have to shrug and face facts that luck doesn't come anywhere near something that has contracted (the equivalent of footballing) leprosy. Everything is falling apart. And trying to cello-tape it together just wont work.